Last time I shared I was talking about praising God even when its hard, when things around you feel dry and dark. I wish that I could tell you that after I sang a few songs I started to feel better, after I counted my blessings I felt lighter and more free, after I got busy with the things right in front of me and stopped worrying about the future I felt peace, but I didn't. I went down deeper. I gave myself permission to grieve and sorrow over what has happened to me. I broke down. I prayed through Psalm 88 and echoed Jobs cries...
Why is light given to a man whose way is hidden,
And whom God has hedged in?
For my sighing comes before I eat,
And my groanings pour out like water.
For the thing I greatly feared has come upon me,
And what I dreaded has happened to me.
I am not at ease, nor am I quiet;
I have no rest, for trouble comes.